Tag Archives: coffee

brotip #1865

2 May

Hello everyone. To those of us who are still in school… ONE MORE WEEK! We can do it… most likely.

Nothing going on. Over the weekend I went home because Becky had prom, and Caitlin came too. I can’t even count the number of THIS dead animal that we saw as roadkill… wtf? I have NEVER seen those before while journeying from Springfield to Independence and back.

The weekend was fun. Friday night we drove around and I showed Caitlin places of interest, Saturday we hung out at home and I went to the dentist (nothing wrong with my teeth). Then Becky came home from getting her hair done, and all her asshole douchebag shithead pieces of shit “friends” decided they were going to take pictures and go to the restaurant 45 minutes early without her, and she wasn’t ready yet, also they decided not to pick her up. I wanted to go to that restaurant and give those little bitches a piece of my mind… like seriously? Do they not have any concern for anyone but themselves? Well anyway, Becky looked awesome and my mom took her to the restaurant and my mom was pretty pissed at those kids too.

Then Carrie had her friend Maureen spend the night, and around 8:00 the 4 of us decided to walk to Yogurtini because me and Caitlin are suckers for fro-yo in Springfield and Caitlin was impressed with Yogurtini. Then my mom picked us up, and dropped Carrie and Maureen off at home, and took Caitlin and I to the movies with her and the 3 of us saw The Lucky One with Zac Efron. We love him.

Went home, went to bed, went to church, and watched High School Musical 3 the next day. We had to leave around 2:30 because Caitlin had a sorority meeting at 6 back at school.

Good news – I got a 97/100 on my mustache video and I finished that class with an A!

So, you may be asking yourself, what does the next week bring for me? So, I would answer you, a shit ton of stuff. Oral Spanish interview in the morning, working in the Alumni office later on to help with pre-graduation stuff, and Potter’s House with the Authentic Ministries crew tonight. A barbecue at the Drury Ambassador advisor’s house on Thursday, and another barbecue with Authentic on Sunday. A computer science program due Friday that I haven’t started yet, and two labs that were started in March but were never finished (with good reason). Cleaning the bathroom Saturday. Mounting my photographs on boards (and first buying said boards). FINALS (one on Tuesday, + a paper being due, and one on Wednesday). I’m going home WEDNESDAY! Packing. Gotta do that Monday, I suppose. My mom is coming around 3 on Wednesday and I have to check out by 4:30. So this should be fun.

I’m just really excited! I survived the first year……… almost.

P.S.The reason I am posting this at 12:30am is because I think tomorrow I will be too busy to post during real hours.
P.P.S. I couldn’t think of a title then I went to facebook and someone posted brotip #1865 as their status and I found it extremely appropriate.

WARNING : Look before you leap

29 Feb

HAPPY LEAP DAY!!! See it’s funny because I put LEAP in the title! And you’ll find that it’s relevant because part of this post is going to get explicit.

So what’s been going on with me? Hmm. I’ll just get right into business, last Thursday I saw my very first live skunk. Yes, a skunk! Thankfully it was about 20 feet away but it was crossing Drury Lane when I was walking back after the basketball game and it was kind of jogging towards the tennis courts. I didn’t know skunks could jog but then again, I’ve only seen them dead up to this point.

Friday – my group and I got accepted into the Summit Park apartments! So this means we will be doing our service project with the animal shelter too. I’m so excited! Friday night, Caitlin and I went to a flea market named “STD Flea Market” (Classy Springfield, real classy), and it was kind of fun. Then a coffee house called Big Momma’s was having a Drury night so we got free mugs and free drinks, anything we wanted off the menu. That was awesome. There was also karaoke in the back room, which was cute. There were about 50 students and a mid-forties-aged large dancing woman that nobody knew where she came from, but she was appreciated for her entertainment value. Caitlin and I had pretty much decided we weren’t going to sing but then Alexis entered our name in to sing “Born to be Wild” which we didn’t even know that song, and the words were even on the screen but we still didn’t even sing it that well. But it was funny and not too embarrassing. Then we rented a movie from redbox that was rated R called “Perfect Student” which was the worst movie I’ve ever seen. It was supposed to be scary but it wasn’t even close. No cursing, no nudity, no sex, no violence, nothing. Could have been rated G.

Saturday – by far the most important (and only) thing that happened was when me and Caitlin went to go see the Vagina Monologues. (Derek (and Nick if you ever get on here), it might be wise to stop reading at this point.) It was a fundraiser by a group on campus called “V-Warriors” which I think stands for Vagina Warriors, and their cause is against domestic abuse. So it was $5 to get in and we got to hear almost two hours of… vagina monologues. It’s exactly what it sounds like.

Here’s an excerpt from one of the pieces called “My Angry Vagina.”
“All this shit they’re constantly trying to shove up us, clean us up — stuff us up, make it go away. Well, my vagina’s not going away. It’s pissed off and it’s staying right here. Like tampons — what the hell is that? A wad of dry f***ing cotton stuffed up there. Why can’t they find a way to subtly lubricate the tampon? As soon as my vagina sees it, it goes into shock. It says forget it. It closes up. You need to work with the vagina, introduce it to things, prepare the way. That’s what foreplay’s all about. You got to convince my vagina, seduce my vagina, engage my vagina’s trust. You can’t do that with a dry wad of f***ing cotton.”

Other titles included: The Flood, A Vagina Happy Fact, The Vagina Workshop, The Vulva Club, and The Woman Who Loved to Make Vaginas Happy. (Among others)
Also they were selling chocolate vaginas. I love chocolate but I probably could not have eaten one of those.
I think I want to perform the Vagina Monologues next year. You’re all invited!!

Monday – a very obscure girl that I may or may not have told you about was eating a cucumber in class. She had the whole entire thing and was just taking bites out of it as if that’s the normal way to eat a cucumber.

Tuesday – Went to the fitness center, and there was a bat on the ceiling! I was just ellipticalling merrily when a maintenance guy with a huge butterfly net came in with a ladder. He didn’t get the bat though. Later, at 10:10 me and Caitlin went to see the Woman in Black, which was scary and we screamed a few times. It’s awesome to go to late movies in college. Then there were tornadoes in Branson when we got back to school.

And I’m skipping 8am photography tomorrow because I don’t need another workday for this assignment, so I get to sleep in as long as I want! It will be just like my Thursdays last semester! :’)

Happy leap day, go do something quixotic to celebrate.


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