30 Things I Learned from College
1. Attendance of lectures is optional (Most my professors posted their lecture notes online along with test dates, meaning I only needed to show up for test)
2. Do not type a paper the day its due
3. Bed Time is never until after Mid Night
4. Do not do a project the day its due
5. You become a professional people watcher
6. Fraternity bro’s are as crazy as in the movies
7. If the trash starts moving around and making noise it should be taken out
8. Combine Shampoo and Body Wash so you don’t have to buy them as often
9. The school pond is infested with E Coli
10. Pepperoni Lunchables get nasty after 30 meals in a row
11. People actually drink Jungle Juice out of nasty hairy bathtubs
12. Colleges in the middle of nowhere produce more alcoholics then a bar with an entrance and no exit
13. Pizza can get unappetizing after several months
14. You skip classes because you are to lazy to climb out of your loft
15. No more than 2 cups of coffee or cans of Red Bull should be consumed daily, anymore and you start to shake and scream.
16. Easy classes are easy, hard classes are I wouldn’t know
17. The larger a class the less a professor cares
18. Labs Suck
19. Labs should be attended
20. The internet is meant to be explored During lectures
21. That moment during a math test when the answer you get after minutes of work isn’t one of the choices, so you pick D because it hasn’t been picked for a while
22. Professors that suck at speaking English suck at teaching
23. Microwaves are the most important devices on the planet
24. A dorm room is like a clown car, you can fit hella amounts of people in a dorm room
25. Whatever seat you pick the first day of class is yours for good, students are territorial
26. 99% of students are constantly moving, tapping legs pencils etc..
27. Laundry is best done after mid night
28. Most meals come from vending machines
29. All the socks you lose are under your bed
30. Its hard to hide a dog in a dorm room, its even harder to train a dog to use a littler box
My last few weeks have been very uneventful. This is my last week of classes, then I have finals next week, then I am done. I took my loft down today and didn’t feel like setting up my bed frame so I just set my mattress on the floor and that’s how I am keeping it. That is all.
-Derek
Hahahahaha